Have you ever found yourself waking up feeling blurry? Nowadays, many of our jobs demand us to work faster, work more, be more efficient, and even work past working hours. We neglect sleep time and the amount of sleep required for full rest. For many years, it seemed like I seldom had a fully rested night and woke feeling fresh and peaceful. Immediately after waking up, I grabbed my phone to check for emails, and read the news and reply to notifications; I rushed to get out of my bed, quickly brushed my teeth, and got out of my apartment as soon as I could. I didn’t have a proper breakfast either. I rushed through normal mornings and attended to clients. Evenings weren’t any better, I promised myself that I would attend to the last client and squeeze in the last email, and go the extra mile working especially with the latest trend of instant messaging, seems like there is no boundary for work time. When I came back from work, I felt so tired and worried about the work the next day. The constant pressure and worry about the next day’s work made it difficult to fall asleep at night. Despite these struggles, I always thought this was just how life should be until I realised I had been living this chaotic life for so long… this rushing impacted my energy, mental health and well-being. The stress and rush are not worth overextending. Something had to change. I wanted mornings that felt peaceful and nights that helped me recharge. I experimented with morning routines and intentional habits, slow living, and little by little, my days transformed.
If you are constantly feeling tired, rushed and overstimulated, here’s how I learned to slow down my mornings and evenings and how you can too!
Set Your Day
The way you start your morning sets the tone for the entire day. Many people like me unintentionally create stress before they step out of bed. The first thing we always do is to reach for and check our phone – it’s a bad habit as if we can’t live without it. I understand the argument that it’s necessary for work. I used to think that way too. But by doing this, your brain immediately goes into reactive mode. My stress levels spiked before my feet touched the floor. Wanting to beat the traffic jam, I often skipped breakfast or didn’t eat proper breakfast, or multitasking while eating. When I looked into the mirror for a few seconds, I saw myself looking tired but still got to rush, not fully awake. There was rushing through my morning without a moment of stillness. Now I give myself at least 20 minutes to ‘warm up’ before checking my phone and mornings transform to be calmer.
What’s The Problems
In our daily lives, we are pressured to be productive from the moment we wake up. Our society glorifies productivity, and multitasking as if slowing down is wasting time. I bought into this idea until I felt so exhausted, the real productivity didn’t come from rushing and doing everything at once, it comes from starting your day with intention and clarity. Our society conditions us that hustling is the key to success. We feel like we need to act upon checking our phones or email, and if we don’t, we might feel guilty because we like to equate slow or rest with laziness. The need to reply most of the time made me anxious. And this chaotic morning creates a domino effect of stress throughout the entire day. Our brain stays wired for stress all day when we start the day in fight or flight mode and this makes it harder for us to process things properly, be creative, focus and ignore other important things like enjoying simple moments. We skipped breakfast, and ran out the door, to get more things done and to save more time. Our conversations are rushed and brief, focusing on a few things at a time and by midday we are already exhausted. Once I started slowing down, I noticed my entire day felt more balanced.
I used to have the thought of getting back time at night. After work, I stayed up late preparing for tomorrow’s work and watching videos on YouTube, a way to have some ‘me’ time before going to sleep. But I was sacrificing my sleep time and this created a cycle of exhaustion that never truly gave me the rest I needed. I always thought I had sufficient sleep or didn’t require too much sleep time at this age in my mid-30s, I really can feel the difference and the importance of having the proper amount of sleep time. I was always thinking of saving time and completing tasks ahead, working on Sundays, like adding value to myself, a way to show my commitment to the company, to show I am valuable, by sacrificing time and my well-being. Many of us believe that being busy equals being valuable, by not doing this, I feel guilty. But the most meaningful lives are not the busiest, they are the most intentional. You don’t have to sacrifice peace for the sake of doing more, just to prove more.
What Changes And What I Did?
I used to wake up to my phone’s annoying alarm that’s the loudest because I was afraid of oversleeping, and snooze again and again to wake me up. My heart would race, as I started my day in panic mode without realizing, like chasing something in the early morning and I now think I should enjoy a slow morning instead. I bought myself an Apple Watch to track my sleep quality and progress, the alarm would trigger a soft vibration on my hand instead of the sudden shock of a really loud alarm. Dimmed the light with the light facing up the ceiling, not harsh light hitting my eyes to allow my body to wind down. I never realized how much lighting affected me until I swapped the bright light for softer light at night. If I am using my phone before bed, I would adjust the brightness to softer, as my unwinding ritual, to tell my brain it’s time to slow down. Waking up then felt so much different. The vibration felt as if someone touching me softly to wake up, giving my body permission and time to ease into the day and not be frightened, the loud alarm sound was synonymous with a bad day. For many years, after snoozing repeatedly, my routine was to start with scrolling social media, reading the highlights of the news, emails, and notifications. Like I felt so left out and needed to get the latest update. My mind was cluttered and overwhelmed before even I got out of bed. There were some nights when I listened to videos until I fell asleep, and the phone was put near me. Now I placed my phone further away and made it not easily reachable by hand at night. I set it to sleep mode so that no notifications and noise, just me with my thoughts at that moment without thinking about tomorrow’s work. No more feeling guilty because slowing down means living fully, allowing me to have some time to reflect and make necessary adjustments, to get another perspective. Not by default mode.
When I wake up, I take a deep breath and stretch. I don’t get out of my bed immediately. Instead I sit on my bed for a few minutes and look out at the view outside the window. No more of my usual rushed routine. A few seconds to appreciate the moment to be able to get up feeling healthy and alive. Frankly, mornings feel so much lighter now, mindful and intentional, a huge difference!
I don’t rush to fill the water in my glass, I realised in the past, that I had been thinking of other things in anything I do. Now, I let the water fill the glass slowly, looking at how the glass gets filled, even just for a few seconds before proceeding to the next thing. It’s a practice even in the office whenever I reach out for a drink. I drink it slowly, I should get some rest and not be bothered by work. This simple ritual also reminds me to be present and this small practice gives me a little moment of peace. My meal? Bite mindfully and not few bites and swallow, I don’t care if I eat slowly.
I started to journal and write down one good thing I feel gratitude towards, whether small wins or progress, it is enough to fuel or remind me whenever I feel down. It helps me end the day on a positive note instead of focusing on what I don’t have, what I didn’t accomplish or what I cannot control. I swapped playing on my phone with a peaceful walk for 15-75 minutes.
There was a constant need to fill up our minds, and our time, faster, with more information, but slowing down taught me productivity or multitasking isn’t always better. In fact, it drained me and left me feeling empty in the end. When I started choosing to do less and be more intentional, I felt smoother. When I am not rushing, I listen better, notice more and connect more deeply with people around me.
If you feel like you don’t have time or find yourself rushing, you could be going too fast, perhaps you should try slowing down, because at the end of the day, peaceful life isn’t found in rushing, it’s the quiet moments we choose to keep and appreciate.
What’s one way you slow down in the morning or evening? Share your story in the comments.