This post continues from my previous post. When you finally walk and listen to the noise, you notice most of our actions, decisions, and spending come from this noise. The noise then becomes your voice of guidance. You will meet a version of yourself that you haven’t met before.

There were days I walked in circles and doubted everything, days when hard work didn’t feel like progress, and when there was progress, it felt insignificant to me. The same questions kept coming to me: “Why does this feel so heavy when I’m doing everything right?”

If you haven’t read my previous post, I suggest you read it here. In this post, I am going to share what I have learned. For all the answers I have been looking for, they didn’t come, and the same is true for clarity. You don’t earn it by knowing, but you earn it by walking through it. You wonder what is next in an uncertain situation. In my early 20s, I wished I had someone to guide me or a roadmap. Indeed, there are so many paths spoken of, but they may not always feel right to everyone. Choosing to keep going, making more mistakes, or identifying what you don’t like or don’t know helps you find your way, even when you have no idea where the road leads. It takes time. Not everyone’s path is the same; realisation beliefs, and acceptance come at different paces. 

There is a strange comfort in control; it’s predictable, and we feel safe. But the most transformative moments were born out of uncertainty.
We only begin to understand when we sit with not understanding. The question is, how else would you know what you truly believe if you have never questioned it before?
Regarding our belief systems, have you wondered about the outcome of certain situations? Is it the way it should be? Or is it simply how things are, with nothing inherently wrong? There is no absolute answer. It’s just about how you want to look at it. No right or wrong.
How would you know what’s yours if you have never felt misaligned?
We are not born knowing who we are; we become ourselves by choosing, not simply by hearing or following. And the becoming begins in the unravelling.

For example, just take a look at how we spend our money.
I used to think money was just numbers, choices, and tools. But it’s more like emotion. People perceive it as identity. Money is a story we often tell ourselves, over and over again, about what we need to feel okay. Most of the time, it is told to us, not written by us.

The Purchases We Make On Someone Else’s Dream

Many times, we buy things not because we need them, but because we need to feel something. 
I am not anti-consumerism in this context, let me explain. Many people buy because of emotion without thinking much. The items we buy can make us feel significant, connected, good or certain.
If we ask ourselves, is this just covering up the silence? Sometimes, it is to copy or look like someone else’s success. Do you see this as progress or just as patterns? Patterns that repeat like echoes: a new designer watch that hides insecurity, a fine-dining meal that masks loneliness, a trendy gadget bought to kill time and boredom and used to check out the lives of others before checking in with ours (especially in the morning), when what you wanted was an escape. We buy distractions instead of facing the discomforting truth, filling the unknown with noise and comparing ourselves with others. Sometimes we don’t even like what we buy; we acquire it just because of the image it could portray regarding status and success. This increases our desire and traps us in the never-ending cycle of comparison and wanting more. We work more to fund our increasing desire that never gets fulfilled yet stresses us out working tirelessly. The irony? Most of that striving isn’t even about having more. It’s about feeling enough. Imagine if you are stuck in this situation, you are tired and you want a rest. Society teaches us to see rest as reward, not a right. And when debt or expectations pile up, we start treating rest like something we have to earn rather than something we already deserve.

What happens when the life you are building isn’t yours? What if the job you are in, the car and home you bought, the watch you wear, and the things you chase were decisions made by a version of you that was trying to please someone else? 

What if your spending habits were stitched together by someone else’s fears, someone else’s ambitions, or someone else’s idea of what a “good life” looks like?

Maybe your childhood taught you that money equals love.
Maybe your social circles taught you that worth equals visibility.
Maybe your career taught you that overwork and busyness equal success.
Maybe you are too busy chasing and have never paused long enough to ask: Is this really mine?

The moments you are brave enough to listen and act will change the trajectory you’ve set for yourself.
It will be confronting, freeing, and uncomfortable.
The worst thing is when we mistake purchases for achievement or protection. They were stitched from expectations that looked like comfort, but they were cages. The most dangerous prison is the one that looks like freedom because you won’t try to escape it. ( you may not even realise it)

The Financial Noise We Mistake as Guidance

If you never learn how to listen, you will mistake noise for guidance. This world of algorithms, constantly trying to tempt you with what you should want based on your activity and interest, can make this noise stronger. But it is in the quiet moments that you will meet the version of yourself that’s not shaped by expectations or advertisements, but the version shaped by deep awareness. When that happens, you stop buying things to seek validation, rewarding yourself with purchases that never make you feel enough. Your relationship with money and your inner self come into sync. You are starting to make decisions for yourself about how to live. You permit yourself to opt out of algorithms, marketing funnels and social media.
When you make purchases intentionally, not impulsively, spending becomes a reflection of your values rather than a reaction to your emotions. You then perceive money as a tool for alignment rather than a way to compensate for what feels off.

You Just Haven’t Met This Version of You Yet

A moment of honesty can change everything. Before you feel the pull from your wallet, the swipe, the add to cart, the tap to pay, pause, breathe, let this item sit in the cart for a few days. 
There’s often a quiet realisation that follows.
And ask:
Is this really me? Or is this someone else influencing you to be another version of who they think you should be?
Maybe this time you will meet yourself without the noise.
Often, many of us could be shaped by expectations, unspoken rules, and advertisements.

Take this moment to reflect on your relationship with your mind and money. This involves chasing less, slowing down and recognising how much you have been carrying that never really belonged to you. You determine your beliefs about how achievements should look like, what money should be used for, and what kind of life you want to have. Spot the patterns in the people around you. Are they really happy or just bragging? When you pause and take time to examine these patterns, you often discover they were inherited, passed down through generations, and amplified through social media- shaped more by insecurities than freedom. 

As you become more aware, you realize that you are allowed to want less. You are finally choosing what truly matters to you, not because you are depriving yourself. You are allowed to write your definition of achievement on your terms without feeling behind in life, based on how you feel, not how it should appear to others. You are allowed to spend simply, slowly, and intentionally without guilt or fear, but out of respect for your values and who you are becoming.

This kind of shift doesn’t always look dramatic on the outside. There are no big announcements or radical lifestyle changes. It’s quiet. When you say no to what doesn’t align, you say yes to your transformation. You no longer feel the pressure to keep up or maintain an image.

You are no longer trying to prove anything or impress anyone. You are living in a way that feels real to you, not to others. You are not simply spending to escape discomfort or to fill a void, because you are choosing clarity over chaos and alignment over impulse. People may not notice the changes but you will feel them deeply. You will notice how your decisions begin to feel lighter, more honest, and clearer because there is no more need for maintenance or upholding someone else’s idea of success. You are free to walk your path. In many cases, this shift means being free from the cycle of living paycheck to paycheck, perhaps pilling up heavy debt requiring repayment, just to use that money to mask deeper discomfort.

If this reflection resonated with you, I invite you to sit with your own spending story. Not to approach it with judgement, but simply to listen to it. Identify the patterns of your spending and ask whether they align with your values, priorities, and the authentic version of yourself.

Chasing someone’s else dreams makes you lose sight of the quiet beauty waiting in your own.